September 14th, 2006


Snakes In An Office

The head of another department was standing outside my cube doing a weird little dance and looking anxiously at the ground.

"What's up?"

"Snake?" he said as a nervous question, rather than a statement.

I got up and came around the door of my cube and there was a foot-long garden snake writhing around next to my cube. As I approached, it predictably retreated. I made a swoop for it, causing it to dart under the wall of another cubicle. A thankfully empty cubicle.

It went under the filing cabinet, so I got a large envelope and took the bottom drawer of the filing cabinet out, exposing the snake who was pretending that I couldn't see him. It looked like a brown spotty snake sitting very still against a brown flecked carpet, but it didn't work. I could still see him. With the envelope I scooted him out from under the filing cabinet and back to the outside of the cubes.

I didn't want to pick him up immediately because he was coiled so that I wouldn't have been able to grab him behind the head (so he couldn't bite me, should he actually prove to have teeth). Instead I played snakey soccer with him, putting one foot on either side of his body and walking slowly forward, encouraging him to do the same. A woman coming back from lunch eyed the two of us and whispered "Is that yours?"

Sure, I'm just giving him walkies... but what I actually said was "No, I'm putting him outside."

Finally he straightened out and I just picked him up and took him outside. He was kind of freaked out, but if he could hold the information in his tiny brain, it would probably make him really happy to know that he wasn't nearly as freaked out as most of my co-workers.
buddha virgin

My Political Playground

I used to be a swing voter, but I ended up teeter-tottering. I was on a slippery slope, but once things started to trickle down, I stuck to the moral high ground. Once the ball was in my court though, I just ran with it (I am a team player, after all).