Saruwatari Ayumi (junglemonkee) wrote,
Saruwatari Ayumi

Another Friday Night Experiment!

We had a visitor to the house Friday night. We had intended to go do the grocery shopping, but neither of us was very motivated for that one. She stayed for an hour and a half and when she finally left at 8:30, we headed for the grocery store.

You know how it is. It's Friday night, the mood is right, and you're all...suggestible. It's the only excuse I can come up with for why this looked good:
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It was the name. Aggressive, yet playful - "Eat me, I'm a Sponch!" The Pirate and I wandered around the store for the rest of the shopping trip just saying "Sponch!" to each other (yes, you could hear the exclamation points), and I thought it would be hilarious to actually try it. Strike that. I thought it would be hilarious to make my family try it, because there's no way I'd ever put that in MY mouth.

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I opened the packet and the room immediately filled with a coconut funk that said right there that the entire thing would end badly. This was NOT the comparitively safe "run electricity through a condiment" kind of experiment. This was putting my family's life and health on the line in the service of knowledge seeking.

Each "cookie" was a sort of crumbly graham-crackery base with four little plops of marshmallowy stuff on top surrounding a dollop of "artificially flavored strawberry jelly" and then sprinkled with coconut. No actual fruits were harmed in the making of this cookie - it's all petroleum products and wood pulp.

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But they are blissfully unaware of their own peril. The Pirate said "They look like little Snowballs, and I used to eat those all the time." And he's still alive, so that's saying something. They linked their arms and prepared for that first delicious bite.

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I don't know what she was expecting, but it wasn't this. I think her cookie might have actually contained a dead gerbil.

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And yeah, the Pirate is pretty much scarred for life. Gone are the lovely Snowball memories, gone the affection for all things coconut-flavored, gone the liver...The surprising thing was that Peaches not only went on to finish hers, but she finished the Pirate's as well! She would have eaten the whole packet had I not made her put them away.

In all, a complete success!
Tags: useless knowledge

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