I am the spam monkey for a large company. Actually, it's not really spam - it's bacn. I write the newsletters and other communications that go out to our million-plus customers.

Here's the reply I got to one of my newsletters today:

The more I hear the worse it gets, Joe and I had a very long talk this a.m. still on xnax, asked him for my stool and record, he said the record was already in Yucca valley, told him I want it, lets cry tonight

I decided that it can only be the words to a country song sung by a man with a face like five miles of bad road and a voice dripping with whiskey and regret.

But yeah. Let's cry tonight.